when the other shoe drops...

Stage IV cancer is not a straight line, it's not predictable.
Remission isn't forever.
Part of me knows that and accepts that.
And part of me also knew that something was wrong, that there's no way I could lose five pounds in five weeks unless IT was back.

So I wasn't really surprised when Dr. Personality came in on Dec. 3 and told me that there was a new mass and that I needed new tests and to consult with Weiser again. Finally, after three and half years, she remembered that I don't actually live in NYC, but was relieved that I could take a couple of days for extra testing (too bad, no teaching in NBR this trip.)

Nothing lights up on the PET scan except a small tumor, 4cm x 2.5cm, in the area of the original tumor resection. It's pressing on and occluding the left ureter--so I needed a stent placed, and a radiation oncology consult, and next week I start the mapping for radiation which begins on (Merry Christmas to me) Christmas Eve. Then after radiation (6 weeks or 25-28 treatments, whichever comes first), a new PET and Weiser will re-evaluate me for surgery.

Other people go to Florida in February; I take disability.
One more time.